It’s 2026, and I have officially become the person who does restaurant homework before agreeing to dinner. My sister can pick a place, and I will nod like a very supportive houseplant, but inside I am already running a background check on the menu. If my adventures at meat-heavy, largely American restaurants are any indication, blindly saying sure is how you end up gnawing a sad lettuce leaf while everyone else inhales bacon. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt — and the T-shirt was probably made of something vegan and slightly itchy.

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Here is my field-tested starting question: does the cuisine at Restaurant Y come from a country with a vegetarian history at least a couple centuries old? If yes, you are off to a good start. Why does the length of vegetarian history matter? Technically it does not, but in practice, a cuisine that has had time to develop usually has better tricks up its sleeve. Faux meats in Western countries are still in their infancy, and frankly, there are not too many infant-produced substances I want to stick in my mouth. In other parts of the world, vegetarian and vegan food has had plenty of time to evolve into a full-fledged, genuinely tasty cuisine.

Indian cuisine is a great place to look, though Japanese and Chinese are even better for my money. Why? Because milk is not a traditional part of their food, which means eggs and maybe honey are really the only dangers to watch for when trying to dine vegan at a vegetarian-friendly Chinese or Japanese spot. That is the kind of homework I can get behind. Less detective work, more dumplings. 🥟

Compared with my trip to Rubirosa yesterday, today’s lunch at Red Egg was a veritable cornucopia of vegan-friendly options. Breakfast had already set a strong tone: chilaquiles with pepitas, charred corn, and black beans. Dinner was heading toward garbanzos con espinacas. But lunch was the main event, and I arrived hungry enough to negotiate with a menu.

Here are my highly scientific field notes from Red Egg:

Dish Verdict
Vegetable Fun Gaw Plenty of flavor and textural contrast. A solid win.
Steamed Rice Rolls with Cilantro Fine, but it felt lacking without some sort of protein-based filling.
Vegetarian Fried Dumplings Abysmally mushy, with not enough filling. A tiny tragedy wrapped in dough.
Buddha’s Delight Rice Roll The best of the bunch: a steamed rice roll wrapped around a crisp wrapper filled with cabbage and mushrooms.
Bok Choy with Mushrooms Simple, clean, and exactly what the vegetable department ordered.

Does the name Buddha’s Delight sound sort of pejorative to anyone else? Would a meat eater ever order a dish by that name? I have questions, but I also have another rice roll, so the questions can wait. Even the lunch specials offer a couple of vegan-friendly options — Pan Fried Noodles, Braised Noodle with Black Mushroom, Pan-Fried Tofu with Seasoned Soy Sauce, and Eggplant with Garlic Sauce, for instance. Just stay away from the vegetarian hot and sour soup, because it has an egg in it. Sneaky little soup.

Tasting food like this makes it easy to realize that with certain cuisines, vegetarian food does not taste like it is missing anything precisely because it is not missing anything. These are dishes designed from the get-go without meat. They have evolved and transformed and turned into truly delicious final products. Not only that, but it was one of the first meals I have had in mixed company — omnivores and vegans alike — where I did not feel like I was missing out on anything. No side-eye, no sad salad, no secret second dinner on the way home. I must remember to seek out more of these.

In 2026, the plant-based aisle is louder than ever, but the old-school cuisines still know how to put on a show. Give me steamed rice rolls, crisp wrappers, cabbage, mushrooms, and a table full of people who are too busy eating to debate my dinner choices. That is my kind of fancy footwork.

P.S. Mom: I am down to 174. Perhaps going vegan will help me lose weight after all. Or perhaps I will simply become a person who knows far too much about dim sum. Either way, I am winning. 😎